2. Confessions

Confessions are things that could either get you a lot of praise, or land you in, for lack of a better phrase, deep shit. Sometimes they're lighthearted and silly, other times they can lead to something better than you had ever imagined, but most times, they flip your whole life on its axis, and send your world spiraling ever downwards into a deep, dark chasm of doom and despair, the likes of which recent statistics show you will probably never return from. Too much? Okay, maybe I'm exaggerating just a little bit, but you get what I'm trying to say, right? That the repercussions (I was SO close to spelling that right on the first try) can span over the polar opposite ends of the spectrum, and shape your fate in whichever way suits their cruel, sick, twisted need to toy with your emotions? You get that, right? That being said, here are my confessions:

1. Even though I'm a girl, and history has shown time and time again that my natural habitat is indeed "the kitchen", I can't cook to save my life, so when I leave home in little over a year (assuming that I actually matriculate), I will be depending on a lot of cereal, and this here book, for my survival:

2. I sucked my thumb as a baby and still have been known to do it every now and then, when I'm scared or nervous. 

3. While I was setting up this blog, I had Justin Bieber's "Under The Mistletoe" on repeat. Of all the things I'm about to confess to you today, that is what I am most ashamed of. 

4. The day I successfully completed "Operation: Escape from the Womb", uhm, I mean, the day I was born, my uncle gave me a giant teddy bear. That giant teddy bear was later named Big Ted (What can I say? I come from a very creative family), and I still have him. And he may or may not take up permanent residence in my bed. And I promise you, I mean that in the least sexual way possible. Awkward. Anyway, this is Big Ted:

5. Unless you're blind, in which case I am very impressed by your ability to read this right now, you should have noticed the bed covers that Big Ted is lying on. No, your eyes aren't deceiving you, I do in fact have a Spider-Man duvet and I don't feel as though I have to explain myself to you. But let's just say, Spider-Man? He's a pretty sick badass motherfucker.

6. Another sick bamf, is Missy Peregrym, who can been seen below. She's the one with the "I am better than you in every way, we both know it, and I don't know why I'm wasting my time and awesomeness listening to your bullshit" look on her face:  

You probably recognize her from Stick It. If you have never seen Stick It, you seriously need to take a long, hard look at yourself in the mirror, get your ass in gear, and fix your life. But anyway, my point is, if I were to have a girl crush on anyone, it would be Missy Peregrym. I'm just sayin'. 

7. I went from getting 70's and 80's in Maths last year, to barely passing Maths this year. 

8. If I could be anything, I would be a surfer, a spy (true story), a comedian, a dancer, a traveler, a motocross racer, or a female (duh) soccer player for the USA team.

9. I have suffered from migraines that knock me unconscious my entire life, but no cause has been diagnosed. It's been quite a while since I've had one so I should be expecting one in the very near future. Yay. I also have constant subjective tinnitus which can get annoying but at the moment, it's really chilled. 

10. I am Gossip Girl. I am also A from Pretty Little Liars.

11. I really like tomato sauce on bread, by itself. Sue me. 

12. I once broke my dad's nose by throwing a Frisbee at his face. By accident.

13. Most times, I'm okay with the ginger jokes, but sometimes I wish people would know when to just quit it.

14. I have two smileys on my left arm. Smileys are the scars that come from burning a lighter until the metal gets really hot, and then branding your skin to leave that smiley face shape.

15. Last year, I went to a tanning bed twice a week for about 3 months, and I promise you, I did get a lot darker, but even then the sun could still reflect off of me, and no one really noticed a difference so eventually I was like, "Fuck this shit. It's cooking my insides and I'm not even benefiting." So I stopped. 

16. When I was younger, I was on the South African golf team. I have a strong natural talent and ability, and I could have gone on to be really, really good, but I hated golf. So, much to the disappointment of my dad, I quit. 

17. I cried on my 15th birthday because I thought I was so old and that my life was practically over and I had nothing to show for it.

18. I think Deadmau5 is the most overrated artist around right now. 

19. If I call you a bitch, it means I consider you a close friend and I like you very much. I may even love you.

20. I'm done.

Do with this information what you will. Until next time, adiós bitches.